Who knows how far I would have let Dusa take me? If not for the sound
of laughter breaking into our senses, I might have let him do whatever he
wanted. I’d become no more than an animal in heat, ready to rut as any
thoughtless beast might. Since this morning, I have decided that we are little
more than primitive creatures, obeying nothing more than the instincts we are
born with. Why else would I have responded so eagerly to the sexual urgings of
a man I hardly know?
It was the sound of others in the distance that woke us from our
would-be mating frenzy. We simultaneously broke the kiss, gasping in shock. I
realized how we were outside and anyone might have stumbled upon our wild
display. A vision of the Pageant Trio with their disapproving faces appeared
before my mind’s eye. I thought of the two women I’d seen hanged outside the
Academy.
I have lost my mind.
The moment broken and our senses restored, Dusa helped me back to
Medical. He wanted to stay, to talk with me, but I couldn’t take his presence
for a second more. Begging exhaustion, I sent him away. Now I’m dealing with
the fallout of what happened.
I carried on carnally with a man where anybody might see me. And not
just a man, an alien man. A Kalquorian, Earth’s avowed enemy. I can’t believe I
let such a thing happen.
More disturbing, I can’t get over how good it felt. I ache for more. I’m
not saying ‘ache’ as a metaphor. I want to kiss that man again so bad it hurts.
The thought of what might have happened if we hadn’t come to our senses in time
scares me, but it excites me too.
Have they been putting something in my food? Something that will make
me want to join one of their clans so they can breed? Something that puts my
hormones into overdrive so that the slightest clandestine touch makes me eager
to be mounted by their men?
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